If one is diagnosed with cancer or any life threatening illness, friends, co workers , family rally around the patient with assistance, concern, well wishes prayers, financial help.
With a pain patient, shortly after the initial diagnoses, no one wants to hear that you are in pain. Sympathy fast diminishes . One must be careful to not mention how one is really feeling, or face losing friends and the support of family. No one wants to hear you are in pain, let alone YOU LIVE IN PAIN- as a way of life.
Perhaps society, family, friends feel threatened by the fact that they too are only one diagnoses or car accident away from a life of pain.
Perhaps we frighten their very well being and happiness, almost as if its contagious. They shudder at the thought of what that might look like for them.
Pain patients quickly learn to minimize their on going distress and discomfort, in order to receive any kind of care or support. Isnt that a sad state of affairs?
Reach out to a pain patient today. Tell them you want to hear how they REALLY are, feel. Tell them you care.
Although not able to heal, love , care and concern are balm for the weary soul. Think of this next time someone share you they live in chronic pain.